(no subject)
WHO: Sam Anders and Lee Adama
WHERE: Lee's quarters
WHEN: Today
WHAT: Lee breaks his shower and calls the repair service. He doesn't get the repairman he was looking for.
WARNINGS: None
[ It's such a stupid job. Just because he's a Cylon doesn't mean that he knows how to fix every machine that breaks down. He doesn't. He isn't a repairman. He was a scientist first. A musician. A pyramid star. A Viper pilot. He has no idea how to do starship maintenance. He barely knows how to do Viper maintenance.
But the powers that be on this ship had given him a job and when the call comes to go perform it, he doesn't really have any choice. He could refuse, sure, but there's a small possibility that he'll know what to do and he figures that he might as well try to be helpful. At least he'll meet another one of his fellow travelers. After the Galactica, he thinks it'll be nice to talk to someone who doesn't look at him with wary distrust or fear.
Sam reaches his destination before too much time has passed and, after a doubtful glance at his toolbox—some of which he doesn't even know how to use—he knocks on the door. Then he plasters on a friendly smile and waits. ]
WHERE: Lee's quarters
WHEN: Today
WHAT: Lee breaks his shower and calls the repair service. He doesn't get the repairman he was looking for.
WARNINGS: None
[ It's such a stupid job. Just because he's a Cylon doesn't mean that he knows how to fix every machine that breaks down. He doesn't. He isn't a repairman. He was a scientist first. A musician. A pyramid star. A Viper pilot. He has no idea how to do starship maintenance. He barely knows how to do Viper maintenance.
But the powers that be on this ship had given him a job and when the call comes to go perform it, he doesn't really have any choice. He could refuse, sure, but there's a small possibility that he'll know what to do and he figures that he might as well try to be helpful. At least he'll meet another one of his fellow travelers. After the Galactica, he thinks it'll be nice to talk to someone who doesn't look at him with wary distrust or fear.
Sam reaches his destination before too much time has passed and, after a doubtful glance at his toolbox—some of which he doesn't even know how to use—he knocks on the door. Then he plasters on a friendly smile and waits. ]

no subject
He stares at Sam, unable to stop himself. Hates how it's almost nice to see a familiar face. He doesn't hate Sam. Once he thought he did, but he doesn't. He sniffs once but doesn't say anything yet. What does he say? Kara's inexplicably gone. His father's gone. Laura Roslin's probably really gone. Helo and Athena went off somewhere with Hera. Even Gaius and one of the Sixes left. The last thing Lee remembers is being alone. This overwhelming feeling of having nothing anymore. The rest of his life stretched out in front of him and he had no idea what to do with it.
Then he was here. There's no real direction for him and he doesn't really care for being in space again after finally finding a real Earth to live on. He swallows and lets out a breath. ]
Ah, yeah. That—that's what I remember, too. Being on land and you...
[ He gestures feebly to indicate the rest of that statement. Then clears his throat and looks away for a moment. Lee then forces a sort of smile and points to the small bathroom. ]
Well, I guess they appreciate irony here. [ A machine fixing a machine. Haha. Ha. ] The shower broke.
no subject
You know we don't all automatically know our way around machines, right?
[ We meaning Cylons. After everything they've been through, it seems more diplomatic not to mention the word. Like maybe they can keep the peace by tactic avoidance. ]
I remember Earth. The way it was before the war. [ Maybe he shouldn't be asking, maybe he should be taking the avoidance a little further, but he wants to know. He needs to know. ] The one you found...
[ Sam's memories after getting shot are... not entirely organized properly. There's a blank space. There's a jumble of data and sensory information from when he was a Hybrid. And there are all the memories of the past that he has yet to fully plumb the depths of. He knows of the new Earth, remembers the data the ship's sensors collected. But a ship orbiting a planet isn't a human walking on its surface.
He looks back at Lee, ignoring the broken showerhead and their interpersonal baggage for something so much more important. There's hopefulness in his voice when he asks; ]
Was it worth it?
[ Gods, he hopes so. After all the death and destruction, something good has to have come of it. ]
no subject
At first Lee doesn't say anything. He's not really sure what to say. He swallows a couple times, wets his lips, drags his teeth over the bottom one. All idle motions to stall for time. Why? He doesn't know. ( He does know. Thinking of this second Earth just reminds him all over again of everything he's lost.
It's not like he's going to cry about it or anything...
Lee exhales, once again his hand lifting to rake through his hair. It settles some back into place, makes some other parts stick out all over again. ]
Yeah. [ the word is rasped; he clears his throat and speaks louder, ] Yeah, I think it is. Or was. Wasn't there long enough before I showed up here.
no subject
[ Reassurance from a Cylon probably isn't welcome and Sam knows it, but for all the damage that his people have done, he isn't a stranger to loss. Earth—his Earth—is gone. The people he loved and the places he called home are gone. It's a loss he's suffered twice, both his real life and the fabricated one John Cavil gave him.
It isn't easy to pretend that he and Lee don't have a history. Most of the antagonism seems so petty now, knowing what he does about who he is, but the feelings are still there. Hurt and anger, however nonsensical they are in reality, aren't so simply rationalized away. But he has to try, not only because they're here in this strange place, but because peace between Cylons and humans must last this time. ]
Humans are tough.
[ He gives Lee the faintest of half-smiles, hoping to emphasize that he's paying the race a compliment, before turning his attention to the shower. Honestly, he has no idea how to fix this one properly. But he did pick up a few tricks on Caprica. ]
I can't make this like new. [ Digging into the toolbag he'd brought with him, Sam fishes out a roll of adhesive film he's assuming is tape. ] But I can make it work again. Just give me, I don't know, say fifteen minutes?
no subject
Ah—yeah. Yeah, sure.
[ Not like he can really rush him or anything. If he can't fix it, he can't fix it. It's not a big deal. There's another shower to use. Lee leans against the desk, positioning himself to watching Sam if he feels like it. He doesn't. Lee's gaze is trained on the floor and he casts about for something to say. Anything to help this from lapsing into awkward silence.
But what is there to say? Does he ask what Sam remembers? Should he ask about Earth before everything literally blew up? Does he ask if he thinks they did the right thing? Lee has no idea how to be all that personable with someone like Sam. Even if they reached some sort of understanding once... Is it possible to do it again? He exhales a breath. ]
Kara's gone.
[ Wow. So, that wasn't what he meant to say and even he seems startled by it. But, now that it's out there, they might as well get the hard topic over with first. ]
no subject
So far so good, even if things are awkward and tense. At least, it is until Lee makes his announcement.
Ah, yes. The one topic he'd wanted to avoid. Though perhaps it's better that they address it now and not allow lingering resentments to fester even more than they already have. Turning away from the shower, Sam looks into the adjoining room from the bathroom.
Kara is, and possibly always will be, a complicated subject. But with the return of his memories and a complete understanding of who and what he is, Sam has clarity and perspective he had not had on the Galactica. He recognizes now what he had always known and chose to ignore: Kara did not love him. She cared for him in her way, he's certain, but she didn't feel the love and passion one ought to have felt for one's spouse. That gift she gave to Lee and more the fool he for ever believing that she might feel the same for him.
Why she married him, he'll never truly know. He suspects Lee understands that better than he can. What he does know is what it feels like to be loved. Thousands of years ago, before the destruction of Earth, he'd had that once. And maybe all it had ever been with Kara was the futile pursuit of a forgotten memory.
He looks at Lee for a moment, studying him, weighing his words, before he finally says softly, sincerely; ]
I'm sorry for your loss.
[ Because it's a loss he thinks Lee feels more keenly than he does. For all that he'd loved Kara, Lee had loved her far longer. And better. Probably deeper as well. After only a slight hesitation, he adds; ]
And I'm sorry for... [ Floundering with a succinct way to sum up all the bad blood between them, Sam makes a vague sideways gesture with his hand. ] Well, everything.
[ Because if they had been in competition, it's clear to Sam that he lost. He can admit it and move on. That seems the healthiest option. ]
I should've handled it better. I didn't. I was jealous and angry and I blamed you. But it wasn't your fault. I realize that now.
no subject
He looks pained for several passing moments; hiding his emotions was never a thing Lee was any good at and it still holds true. His heart thumps heavily and he swallows several times around a sudden lump forming in his throat. Though he doesn't mean to, when he opens his mouth he laughs. But, the sound is mirthless and mostly air. An action to break the tension building inside of himself. ]
Pathetic, right? [ Lee's voice is a little thick, a little rapsy. He shakes his head slightly and still can't really look at Sam yet. Not yet. ] I was jealous and angry, too. [ And not even just with Sam. But with his brother and... everyone else she seemed to turn to instead of him. ] And frakked so much up along the way.
[ He sniffs then exhales a long breath through his mouth, wets his lips and tries to say something. He flounders, quiets, then tries again. This time, eventually, he does look at Sam. ]
I'm sorry. [ It's not what he meant to say this time, either. What he meant to say was to tell Sam he didn't need to offer any kind of apology. Lee was the one who frakked up. Not Sam. He can't accept that apology. But, subconsciously—apparently—he realizes this is something they just have to do to move on from this. ] I shouldn't have— [ ...done a lot of things he did; he scrubs a hand over his face; ] Well, I just shouldn't have.
[ He doesn't hate Sam because of all the stuff with Kara. He hates Sam because he's a toaster 8V ( jk ) ]
no subject
He looks at him, but it's the kind of focus that's soft and hazy. He's watching and paying attention, listening to what Lee's saying and what he's trying to say, but he isn't scrutinizing or judging him. The time for that has passed. ]
Apology accepted. [ He says it quietly, not so immediately that it sounds like he's being disingenuous and not so forcefully that it sounds like he's lying. He isn't doing either of those things. ] I mean that. What happened to me, it—Well, it put things in perspective.
[ Sam doesn't say he'd like them to be friends. Maybe some day they will be, but he can't force it. They need time to process everything that's happened, both to the fleet and to them personally. Once they have, who's to say what path they'll find themselves on? Sam's certainly been surprised before. Maybe he will be again. ]
And I've put this shower head back on as well as I can. But I'll send a real plumber out to have a look at it, all right? I used to have a busted old thing in my apartment on Caprica that I fixed a few times, but I wouldn't say I'd good at things like this.
no subject
Maybe he's supposed to learn something here from all of this.
Of course, he doesn't know what that is so he can't really say one way or the other. Much like he doesn't know if he's supposed to keep on this track or just let the derailment about the shower happen. Might as well just let it go. What more is there to say? ( Besides the things they've both buried deep and won't show themselves until alcohol or anger pries them loose. ) So, Lee just breathes and rubs a hand over his face. ]
Yeah, sure. [ Lee makes an aborted sort of gesture. ] It's probably fine. If not there's a head down the hall. [ He offers a small lopsided grin. ] Nicer than the racks on Galactica, huh.
no subject
Although, considering how old the battlestar was, it's not really that surprising. ]
Yeah. [ He nods, still smiling a little. ] It sure is. It's a shame the old ship wasn't more like this one, for how long everyone was cooped up on it.
[ Packing up his stuff, Sam leaves the bathroom and starts toward the door. He can't stay and chat like they're friends, but he doesn't just want to leave without... He's not sure. Making a gesture, maybe. Trying to bridge the distance between them, for familiarity's sake if nothing else. So he stops mid-way there and looks at Lee. ]
Listen, if you ever—I mean, it's nice. Seeing a familiar face. You ever want to, I don't know, talk or anything, let me know.
no subject
He looks in Sam's direction but not fully at him. There's a distant, glazed look to his expression while the thoughts swirl in his head. Sam, too, is familiar.
So, maybe being here isn't the worst thing that could happen to him.
He's lost within his own thoughts that he nearly misses the offer Sam makes. It filters through his own internal angsting on the topic of his life and he looks at Sam only slightly startled. ]
Oh, um. [ Intelligence runs deep. He gives himself a mental shake and nods. ] Yeah. It is nice, yeah. [ Because it is. He's not just paying lip-service there. ] Same to you. [ He lifts a hand in a slightly dorky send-off. ] I'll see you around, Sam.